Falling
by csiAngel
Summary: GC friendship When Lindsey falls downstairs Catherine starts behaving very strangely chapters 3 and 4 up COMPLETE!
1. Chapter One

Disclaimer: The characters and premise of CSI belong to the show's producers, and the fabulous actors that portray them. I am simply borrowing them.  
  
Chapter One  
  
Lindsey turned to her mother and both frowned then looked back to the source of their confusion. Catherine unlocked the front door and quietly took Lindsey inside before returning to her front porch, and the sleeping form that was the course of their puzzlement. She pulled the door closed behind her and bent down beside him, gently touching his shoulder as she spoke.  
  
"Gil?" she said, softly, jumping back when he startled awake.  
  
"Cath?" Grissom frowned as his eyes and mind adjusted to his surroundings.  
  
Catherine stood back and watched him as he stood up and the sleep cleared from his features.  
  
"What are you doing here?" she asked, quite abruptly.  
  
A slight frown creased Grissom's brow as he noticed her tone. "You didn't turn up for work; you weren't answering your phone... I came over as soon as I could – " he explained.  
  
"And fell asleep?"  
  
"I figured you would be home some time... I was waiting. Are you okay?"  
  
Her tone remained harsh, and the look on her face supported it. Her eyes glared coldly at the man standing bemused in front of her. "Lindsey fell downstairs. We've been at the hospital since last night. I'm sorry I didn't call, but I was a little preoccupied."  
  
"Is she alright?" Grissom said quickly, worry clear in his face.  
  
"She's fractured her ankle and wrist and twisted her elbow. She was lucky... And, she's inside now, so..." she trailed off as she moved towards the door. When she reached it she paused. "I am sorry I didn't call... But now you know why... And I won't be coming in tonight. I'll be in touch about tomorrow."  
  
Catherine turned to walk into the house, a stunned Grissom temporarily unable to speak to figure out why she had such an attitude towards him. Seeing the door closing, he snapped out of his puzzled trance.  
  
"Cath?" he said quickly, stepping towards the door.  
  
She stopped, the door still half closed, and stared at him from the doorway.  
  
"Can I come in and say hi to Linds?" he asked, with a genuine, warm smile.  
  
Her expression didn't soften at all. "It's been a long night. She's tired. Maybe some other time." With that she closed the door, leaving Grissom to stare at it, more concerned about her now than he had been when he was unable to contact her.  
  
He had just turned to leave, knowing that she wasn't going to talk to him today, so he would give her some space then try again, when the door opened behind him.  
  
"Gil."  
  
He turned back at her voice, smiling gently. "Yeah?"  
  
Her eyes still hard, she shrugged. "Lindsey would like to see you now, if you have time."  
  
His eyes frowning slightly at the impatience he could see in hers, Grissom smiled again and walked towards the house.  
  
"I've always got time for Lindsey... and you," he smiled, following her into the house and closing the door behind him.  
  
Catherine was already in the lounge, at Lindsey's side, fussing over her daughter who was sitting on the sofa, her leg out in front of her, a pillow behind her, and a blanket ready by her side.  
  
"Do you need anything, sweetie? A drink? Some cookies?" she was asking as she adjusted cushions around the young girl, and made sure the TV remote and some magazines were easily within her reach.  
  
Lindsey was lightly protesting to all the fuss, assuring her mum that she was fine. "Mom, really! I'm okay. I have everything I need..." When Catherine continued to list items she might like, she continued, "Mom! Stop! I'm fine."  
  
Catherine smiled to her. "Okay, baby... Well, Grissom's here... I'll go get you a drink." She kissed her daughters forehead then left the room heading for the kitchen, ignoring the shout of:  
  
"Mom, I have a drink!"  
  
that followed her.  
  
Lindsey shook her head slowly, rolling her eyes playfully, then she smiled widely at Grissom.  
  
"Hey kiddo," he smiled, walking towards her. "How you feeling?"  
  
Lindsey shrugged, wincing when that hurt her injured arm. "I'm okay. It hurts... a little, and Mom won't stop fussing."  
  
Grissom sat down on the coffee table. "She's just worried about you. You know what mums are like... So how did you manage to fall downstairs anyway?" he said light-heartedly.  
  
"My foot landed on the edge of one of the steps and slid off. I only fell down about six steps. Could have been worse."  
  
Grissom nodded. "So, do you get the day off school?"  
  
"It's summer. We're off anyway," she replied in a tone that implied the expression "D'uh!"  
  
"Ah, of course. Sorry."  
  
"So why were you asleep on our porch?"  
  
"I was waiting for your mum to get home... I didn't know where she was. I was worried about her."  
  
Lindsey nodded that she understood. "You're lucky I only fell down six steps, else you could have been there all day," she giggled.  
  
Grissom was just laughing with her when Catherine came back into the room, placing another drink and a plate of cookies on the table at the side of the sofa.  
  
"There you go, honey... Now, you should get some rest."  
  
"I'm just talking to Grissom."  
  
"You haven't slept all night, baby. You should sleep now, then I'll make you whatever you want for lunch."  
  
"But – "  
  
Grissom stood up. "Your mum's right. You need to sleep, it'll help you get better, then you'll be out playing in the sun again... I'll come by another day and we can talk some more."  
  
Lindsey sighed, "Okay... Come back soon!" she instructed as Grissom gently kissed her forehead.  
  
"I will," he promised with a smile. "Can I just have a quick word with your mum before I go?"  
  
Lindsey nodded, hitting her mum's hand away from the cushion under her arm and telling her to go with Grissom.  
  
When she had followed him into the hallway, Grissom took the opportunity to study Catherine's eyes, in hopes of establishing why she was behaving so strangely. He had seen Catherine as a worried mother before and, whilst that would be expected, this was different.  
  
"Gil, I have things to do," she said, staring at him impatiently again.  
  
"Are you okay?" he asked, ignoring her tone.  
  
"I'm fine... Just busy." That was all she said, then she stood in silence – he could tell she was mentally tapping her foot.  
  
"Okay. Call me if you need anything."  
  
Catherine nodded once and opened the front door.  
  
"Cath – "  
  
She swung her head round to face his and, for the first time that morning, allowed his eyes to capture hers, immediately causing her wall to waiver a little.  
  
"Anything," he repeated for emphasis.  
  
Catherine smiled gratefully, and nodded convincingly this time.  
  
After Grissom left, she leaned against the back of the door, taking a deep breath to control her tears. Walking into the lounge she found that Lindsey had already drifted into sleep.  
  
She lifted the blanket and covered the sleeping child, then sat down gently beside her.  
  
Watching her sleep, her tears escaped and she allowed them to flow freely down her cheeks. She carefully brushed some hair out of Lindsey's face and whispered:  
  
"I'm sorry I wasn't here, baby... I'm so sorry."  
  
TBC... 


	2. Chapter Two

Chapter Two  
  
She recognised the knock at the door; and, very few people would visit at this time in the morning. She considered ignoring it, like she'd ignored all his calls for the last twenty-four hours, but, whilst she had been able to stop her hand from reaching for the phone, she found herself unable to stop herself from opening the door. Because she didn't want to.  
  
As expected, it was Grissom. But what she hadn't expected were the bags in his hands, and the smile on his face.  
  
"I hope you haven't eaten," he said cheerfully, holding up the bags.  
  
Catherine stared at him, confused. The way she had treated him last time he was here, she was amazed he had come back. But she knew why he was there, or, at least, she had thought she did.  
  
"Erm... No, we haven't," she said quietly, still frowning.  
  
"Good." When Catherine continued to just stand in the doorway, staring at him, he added: "May I come in?"  
  
Snapping back to reality, she nodded and stepped aside to let him pass. He walked in and headed straight for the kitchen.  
  
Still frowning, she watched his back as it disappeared from view, then she closed the door.  
  
Following him into the kitchen, she found him unpacking the bags onto the counter.  
  
"Gil, what are you - ?"  
  
"Banana pancakes," he announced with a beaming smile, glancing up briefly from the food. He looked back to continue unpacking, but looked up again quickly, a more serious expression on his face. "They're Lindsey's favourite, right?"  
  
Catherine nodded. "Yeah... But – "  
  
This time she was interrupted by Lindsey shouting to her from upstairs.  
  
"I'm coming, sweetie," she replied to her, then she excused herself from Grissom and went upstairs.  
  
A few minutes later she returned with Lindsey, and helped her onto a chair at the table in the kitchen.  
  
"Hey, Grissom!" Lindsey grinned when she saw him.  
  
"Hey, kiddo. How's it going? Your Mom taking good care of you?"  
  
Lindsey smiled. "Of course she is. What are you doing here?"  
  
Grissom looked at Catherine, and intentionally caught her eyes with his. "Taking care of your Mom."  
  
Catherine's breath caught in her throat, and she felt her defences melting again.  
  
Lindsey giggled, then cried out in pain. Catherine was instantly at her side.  
  
"Baby, what's wrong?" she said quickly, panic clear in her voice.  
  
"I'm okay. I just moved my elbow, and it hurt... I'm okay now," Lindsey said.  
  
"Are you sure?... Do you want to go and sit on the sofa? Do you want a drink?"  
  
Lindsey rolled her eyes as Catherine again ignored all her responses, and proceeded to the fridge to get her a glass of water.  
  
"Mom! I don't want any water. I'll have a drink with breakfast!"  
  
Catherine continued rummaging through the fridge. "Where's the water? There were several bottles of water in here."  
  
"Mom, I really don't need any, don't worry about it," Lindsey said softly, growing quite concerned about how worked up Catherine was getting, as she frantically searched the fridge.  
  
"There were some in here!" she exclaimed.  
  
"Cath," Grissom tried.  
  
"Where is it?!"  
  
"Catherine!" Grissom raised his voice and took hold of her hands in the fridge. She immediately turned to face him, breathing deeply, a glare ready to greet him. "Lindsey's fine. She can have orange juice with breakfast, and I'll go to the store later and pick up some water for you. Don't worry about it."  
  
Catherine closed her eyes and let out a long shaky breath. Then, opening her eyes again, she looked into his. "I'm sorry."  
  
"It's okay," he smiled. "I get really angry when I can't find any chocolate covered grasshoppers in my fridge."  
  
Lindsey wrinkled her nose up at the thought of eating bugs, but Catherine remained serious.  
  
"Not just for that," she said quietly to Grissom.  
  
"I know," he smiled understandingly. "We'll talk later."  
  
Catherine nodded.  
  
"Now," Grissom said as he returned to all the food he had laid out, "Who wants banana pancakes?"  
  
TBC... 


	3. Chapter Three

Chapter Three  
  
Grissom had settled Lindsey on the sofa with a new DVD and some ice cream, whilst Catherine tidied the kitchen. He returned to find her staring out of the window, a troubled tension holding her face.  
  
Walking over to her, he stopped beside her and also looked out of the window. After a short moment of silence, he quietly spoke. "She's fine."  
  
Catherine lowered her head, closing her eyes. "I'm driving her insane, aren't I?"  
  
"No," Grissom insisted.  
  
Catherine looked up at him. "She was overjoyed that you were gonna take her into the lounge not me."  
  
"That's because I'm wonderful," he smirked, his joke serving its purpose and prompting a small smile from Catherine. "That's better," he said.  
  
"What is?" she frowned.  
  
"I've missed that smile," he replied softly. For several seconds he held her gaze, both standing in silence, his presence enveloping her in comfort. Feeling the strength she had convinced herself she needed leaving her, Catherine broke the contact and turned away, moving towards the table.  
  
Grissom allowed her the space, remaining where he was as he started the next line of conversation.  
  
"What's wrong, Cath?"  
  
"I would have thought it's obvious. I'm just worried about Lindsey," she replied, her abrupt, defensive tone returning.  
  
"No you're not," Grissom responded, then seeing the anger building in her eyes, he realised how she had interpreted his comment, and quickly added: "I mean, you're not just worried about Lindsey, there's something else going on here. Tell me what it is? I'm here to help."  
  
"Right!" she snorted, actually making Grissom jump with the suddenness of the outburst. "So, you're not here to talk me out of resigning?"  
  
"No," he said simply.  
  
"So it's just a coincidence that you turn up here on the day you would have been handed my letter?"  
  
"If you want to resign then I won't stop you," he said calmly.  
  
There was a brief silence as Catherine looked at him, shocked. "You won't?"  
  
He shook his head. "If it's what you want, then I'll support you."  
  
Catherine frowned at him. "Really?"  
  
He nodded. "You have to do what will make you happy, and if resigning is what you need to do, then... well, I have no right to ask you not to do it... I would like to make one request though."  
  
Still shocked, Catherine asked: "What's that?"  
  
"Don't be a stranger?" His eyes again caught hers, and again she felt the power draining from her body. The effect he could have on her was overwhelming. She shook herself free, looking away to try to break the spell.  
  
"I haven't said that it is what I want... I just need some time to sort my head out... I'll take it unpaid, you'll be able to get someone to fill in for me. I'm not trying to be selfish!"  
  
"And how will you survive without the money?" he asked.  
  
"I have the money from Sam, we'll – " Seeing the look of disdain on Grissom's face, she stopped in the middle of that sentence. "At least I wouldn't have to see that every time the money, or Sam came up. I'm sorry I brought the lab and your precious reputation into dispute, but Lindsey is more important to me than any of that, and I needed that money to give her the life she deserves!..." she took a deep breath. "And part of what she deserves is a mother who sees her for more than two hours a day!... God, it's no wonder Ed used to report me for neglect." She began to walk towards the door.  
  
Grissom knew she was heading for Lindsey, that her constant fussing over Lindsey now, was her way of making up for this guilt she was feeling. But he also knew that none of that would make her feel better. He crossed the room quickly, and gently took her arm to stop her.  
  
"Cath, Eddie's reasons for reporting you were selfish, he was thinking of himself, not of Lindsey."  
  
She looked to him. "That may be, but there was some truth to it. I'm never here, Gil. She spends more time with Julie – " at Grissom's slight puzzled look, she added, "Her nanny – than she does with me."  
  
Grissom looked at her sympathetically and, softly placing his hands on her shoulders, turned her to face him. "You can't be by her side every minute of every day. This resignation business has come out of the fact that she fell downstairs – and, yes, by all means take some time off to look after her - but, you were here when she fell, and it still happened. The fact that you have a very time consuming job is not responsible for this."  
  
Catherine eyes lowered, and a look of shame swept her features as Grissom said his penultimate sentence. He noticed this, and suddenly realised what had really caused this behaviour.  
  
"You weren't here," he said, more of a statement than the question that she might have expected.  
  
Catherine shook her head slowly, still unable to look at him.  
  
His hands moved away from her, a subconscious movement that he didn't really notice, but she felt their absence immediately. "But you weren't at work... So it's not really your professional life that's the problem here." He didn't mean for his words to sound so cold, and he probably wasn't aware that they did, but the anger it triggered in Catherine gave her the energy to lift her head.  
  
With another sarcastic laugh, she hissed at him. "So you came to talk me out of a personal life?"  
  
"No... I didn't know that you weren't here when she fell... I came to look after you, to make sure you were thinking straight, and that you didn't make any irrational decisions – "  
  
"It's irrational to want to give up something that keeps me from my daughter?!" she practically shouted at him, moving away from him again, back into the kitchen – a sign that she was going to allow this conversation to continue.  
  
"Work is not the only thing keeping you from her! You weren't at work when she fell!" he shouted back, jealousy he had so far done well to hide, taking over his sense of logic. "This guy must be pretty amazing if you'll throw away your career for him!"  
  
"I'm giving up work for Lindsey!"  
  
"There is more than work in the way here!"  
  
"I am entitled to a personal life!"  
  
"But do you really want a personal life that doesn't involve Lindsey?!"  
  
This hit a sadness nerve, rather than an anger nerve, and Catherine was silent. They just stood staring at each other, chests heaving, pulses still racing.  
  
After about a minute, Catherine quietly said: "They aren't exactly queuing at my door."  
  
Equally quiet, Grissom responded: "No, but occasionally there's one sleeping on your porch."  
  
TBC... 


	4. Chapter Four

Chapter Four  
  
Catherine's heart skipped a beat, and her eyebrows flicked up a little. "What are you saying?" she just managed to ask, through the breathless feeling that had overcome her.  
  
Grissom suddenly felt nervous. What was he saying? "I'm just saying, some men would have called to see how Lindsey was," he shrugged.  
  
"You assume that he didn't call," she said, regaining control of her mind.  
  
Grissom nodded. "If he did call, then I'm sorry. But, if he didn't, he doesn't deserve you."  
  
"I know," Catherine said, sitting down at the table, leaning her head on one hand.  
  
"You know?" Grissom asked.  
  
Catherine nodded. "I finished it with Chris yesterday."  
  
"Why didn't you say? Instead of letting me go on like that," he said, sitting down beside her.  
  
"Your comments deserved retaliation. I couldn't retaliate by saying you were right, could I?"  
  
"You could have," he smiled. "I've got used to being right."  
  
Catherine's eyes turned to his as he smirked, and she couldn't help smiling. "I'm sorry... again."  
  
"For what?" he said shrugging it off.  
  
"For apologising, and then proceeding to do the same thing again. Everything's just hit me in the last couple of days... I was angry at myself, not at you. I shouldn't have taken it out on you."  
  
"I know," Grissom grinned.  
  
Catherine laughed. "And I know that resigning probably isn't the best move to make, but I don't know how else to show Lindsey that she is the most important thing in the world to me. I have been neglecting her – no matter what you say."  
  
"Lindsey knows. You heard her earlier, when I asked if you were taking good care of her, she said 'Of course she is'... Take your time off, then we'll look at how we can prevent you from having to do so much overtime... If necessary I'll give it all to Sara," he smiled.  
  
Catherine laughed again and looked at him, and this time the way she looked at him made him feel powerless. "Gil?... What you said before - "  
  
"I've said a lot."  
  
"'Occasionally there's one sleeping on your porch', what did you mean?"  
  
"Like I said, I meant some men would have called," he said, the mysterious look in her eyes causing his heart rate to quicken.  
  
"And some men would have called several times, and when they didn't get a response, turned up on the doorstep to make banana pancakes?"  
  
Grissom's mouth twitched into his cute little smile, and his eyes sparkled as he said: "No, men like that don't exist."  
  
Catherine giggled. "You're on top form with the comedy this morning, Mr Grissom."  
  
"Am I not always?" Grissom pouted.  
  
Catherine hit him playfully, as she continued to laugh. "Stop it!"  
  
"Stop what?" Grissom asked, laughing at her laughter.  
  
"Stop trying to be cute."  
  
"I wasn't trying," he laughed, dodging her hand. "It comes naturally."  
  
Deftly sneaking her other hand through to hit him, Catherine grinned victoriously. Then they both continued laughing until Catherine captured Grissom's eyes and an awkward silence fell over them. They were both still smiling as they calmed down from the laughing, but the tension was thick in the air and they could feel it.  
  
Grissom was the first to find the ability to speak. "Cath," he said, barely above a whisper, but concern evident in his tone.  
  
"I know," she said, reluctantly looking away.  
  
"You've already got enough to deal with."  
  
Catherine nodded. Then she took a deep breath and sat up straight, composing herself. "Thanks for coming today."  
  
"Any time. You okay?"  
  
"Yeah... I think I'm thinking more clearly now. I don't know how you did it, but you've helped me out of the well of self hatred I was falling into... I'll let you go get some sleep now," she said, standing up.  
  
Grissom took his cue and stood with her. "Promise me you'll call if you feel yourself falling again?"  
  
Catherine nodded, and held out her arms for a hug.  
  
Grissom complied and stepped towards her, wrapping her in his arms. "Let me catch you," he whispered.  
  
Ten minutes later, Grissom had said goodbye to Lindsey, and Catherine waved him off from the door. When he had gone she went into the lounge and sat down beside her daughter.  
  
"You okay, baby?"  
  
Lindsey nodded. "Are you?"  
  
Catherine smiled. "Yeah."  
  
"You were freaking me out," Lindsey said seriously.  
  
Catherine laughed a little. "I'm sorry, sweetie. I freaked myself out too."  
  
"And Grissom?"  
  
Catherine was thoughtful for a moment. "Surprisingly, no. I don't think Grissom's freaked out by anything I do."  
  
"That's 'cause he loves you," Lindsey giggled.  
  
"Does not!" Catherine argued playfully.  
  
"Does too!" Lindsey laughed.  
  
"Does not!"  
  
"Does too!"  
  
"Does not!"  
  
"Does too!"  
  
"So, what were you watching?" Catherine tried to change the subject.  
  
"Freaky Friday," the little girl grinned. "Are you quitting your job?"  
  
Catherine looked at her seriously. "If you want me to."  
  
Lindsey shook her head. "You like it... Did you kiss Grissom?"  
  
Catherine's eyes widened. "No, I did not!"  
  
Lindsey sighed. "Why not? You love him too."  
  
"Do not!"  
  
"Do too!"  
  
The familiar discussion continued until Catherine failed to speak and Lindsey shouted:  
  
"See!... So why didn't you kiss him?!"  
  
Catherine looked at her, wondering when she'd got so cheeky, and sighed, resigning herself to the fact that there was no point trying to lie.  
  
"It's too soon... After my 'freaking out'."  
  
"Mom!" Lindsey's tone was serious. "How long have you known him?"  
  
Catherine frowned, wondering where this line of questioning was going. "About twenty years."  
  
"Wow! That's longer than I thought! So that definitely proves it! There is no such thing as too soon for you two."  
  
Catherine just stared at Lindsey in amazement.  
  
"Mom?" Getting no response Lindsey waved her hand in front of Catherine's face. "Mom?" Still nothing. Lindsey sighed and put her film back on.  
  
Quarter of an hour later, Catherine had recovered from her shock, and was enjoying Lindsey's DVD with her, when there was a familiar knock at the door. Despite wondering why he had come back, she couldn't help smiling.  
  
Opening the door, for the first time in the last two days she greeted him with a smile.  
  
"Hey. Did you forget something?" she asked brightly.  
  
Grissom held out a bag to her. Frowning, she took it from him and looked inside, smiling when she saw its contents. "Thank you," she said.  
  
"No problem." He turned and started walking down the path, but after a few steps he stopped and turned back. "Oh, do me a favour?"  
  
Catherine nodded, waiting for him to tell her what it was.  
  
"Put them in the door of the fridge, so you'll know where they are."  
  
THE END 


End file.
